Oh my god, this countryside! LOOK AT THAT. That is GORGEOUS. I can only imagine what it’d look like with a blue sky, rather than a red one.
There’s one problem, though. It’s oddly quiet. No birds, no animals, no nothing.
I thought I heard quiet whispering for a second, but that seems to have just been my imagination.
I’m takin’ a walk. :DDD
close one eye
Are those guys in the distance wearing outfits like mine? o_o
step to the side
The others are calling me back.
..they’re looking at me funny.
You’ve got to be kidding me. Someone told these guys I had blown up the hearse. They think I’m some harbinger of death, le bouffon blanc. I’m not a buffoon. ._.
They wouldn’t let me stay. They seemed to get more and more angry with each reply I made. I just tried to ask for forgiveness, to be accepted. D: They looked.. afraid.
Now I’m on my own again.
Well, sign says Paris is this way, so at least there’s something.
I WISH THIS WAS EASYYYY.
Heeeere I go agaaaain on my owwwwn, walkin’ down the only roaaad I’ve ever knowwwn. Like a drifter, I was borrrn to walk aloooone.
This road is oddly devoid of all life, whether it be friendly or fucked-up. It’s been going for miles. ..well, I suppose it’d be kilometres.
Still, you get the point.
I hear cawing.
I’m pretty sure it’s the same cawing I’ve been hearing for a week now.
What is it, though?
I see nothing in the skies, and nothing’s anywhere in sight on the ground.
I’m pretty damn hungry. I haven’t eaten in a while.
There’s a house off in the distance!
Nobody’s answering. I’ll see if I can break in.
Ohhhh hoh hoh hoh. Dear journal, today I met the object of my childhood obsessions. No, not girl farts. I met.. a crowbar.
Note to self: Don’t ever show anyone this journal. Better yet, just rip that page out before you show it to people.
..this house doesn’t have a basement? Damn! I hope the next one I find will.
On the road again, I’m so glad to be back on the road again. That’s a lie, by the way.
Found another house. This one’s also deserted.
DEAR SWEET I say “dear sweet ______” a lot these days.
I don’t even know why I was so surprised. It’s a skeleton. Did I not expect to see dead people in the apocalypse?
Well, okay, I mean, skeletons are a little.. freaky.
Damn, it’s dark down here.
I should probably try speaking en francais from time to time, since I am en france, after all.
ALORS! C’est tres, tres— comment dit-on “dark” en francais? Je ne sais pas.
Well, that was pointless.
FILS DE LA PUTE
GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU STUPID I HATE YOU DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE
DIE DIE DIE NO DIE SHUT UP DIE I DON’T CARE JUST DIE
Fucking skeleton. Came to life. Yeah, well, lemme tell ya, skeletons don’t react too well to having a fucking crowbar in their fucking faces.
Yeah, who’s laughing now, pute?
I had no idea I knew how to swear in French.
Well, I definitely went down a rabbit hole.
How am I so certain?
Well, last time I checked, France wasn’t fucking Dogscape.
I’m gonna go throw up.
The rabbit hole’s not one-way, right? I can go back? Please let me fucking go back I’m not going out there oh my god.
..Jordan, let’s be reasonable about this. We both know— that is, me and myself— that the rabbit holes act like… like, uh…. what’s it called, again? That place in Minecraft. That Nether place. Where every step in there is equal to eight steps in the normal place. So yeah, rabbit holes are like that. You won’t have to go too far out there in Fucking-I-Hate land.
I wish Fentzy was here. She’s appreciate that joke.
Yeah, Jordan. You wanna know what else Fentzy would do?
She’d fucking do this. Dogscape wouldn’t scare Fentzy.
You’re right, myself. She’d take Dogscape by the dog-balls and fuck it up the ass, doggy-style. Just the way she’d like it.
Problem is, I’m usually the subby boy. I don’t want to be buttfucked by Dogscape.
…so I won’t let it. >w>
Goddamn, that was pretty badass of me.
OH GOD I HATE THIS OH GOD OH MY GOD I’M SO FUCKING GLAD I’M WEARING SHOES
FUCK YOU, BADASS PART OF ME.
IT’S MY BODY, DOGSCAPE. AND IF YOU’RE TOUCHING ME IN A WAY OR PLACE THAT MAKES ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE, THAT’S NO GOOD.
SO WHAT WILL I DO, DOGSCAPE? FIRST, I’LL SAY NO. THEN, I’M GETTING THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.
DEAR SWEET MOTHERFUCKING SWEET DEAR THE FUCK YOU NO
OF ICE CREAM
OF ICE CREAM
RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN
GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE PLEASE PLEASE OH GOD PLEASE
YOU’RE ENJOYING THIS AREN’T YOU
YOU’RE ENJOYING MY SUFFERING
WELL FUCK YOU
Wait, I have a crowbar.
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE
home earth life not covered in dog guts
thank you rabbit hole
dogscape’ll eat me
even though i’m back in reality i can’t sleep dogscape’ll eat me
i don’t wanna be a part of it
(The next several pages of the journal are filled with insane scribblings and words. “Dog” appears a lot. They stop by 11 PM.)